A Little Boy....

Bill and I had our Orientation phone call for our adoption tonight. We started our call around 9pm, and didn't get off until almost 10:30pm. (David, who we spoke with, is in California, so not as late for him!) He outlined the process for us, and what we can expect as we move forward in this journey. He reviewed the fee schedule, and answered many of our questions. He asked about us, about why we are interested in pursuing adoption. He shared his own adoption story, and explained how he would play a significant role in facilitating ours.

And in the quiet of this house, with Mason sleeping and the dogs curled up on the couch, I realized just how much we miss Ruslan. Bill and I sat at the kitchen table, both looking at copies of the orientation documents as we talked. We were each taking notes, asking questions, and listening intently.

And I was thinking....about a little boy who squealed with delight when Bill lifted him up to touch the ceiling before bed....about a little boy who was so excited to have his own toothbrush and toothpaste that he brushed his teeth every chance he got, even when his bleeding gums left him spitting out toothpaste foam tinged with pink....a little boy who was over the moon excited when he got to pick out a new pair of shoes at the shoe store....a little boy who was so thankful when we treated his cuts and scrapes with neosporin and band-aids...a little boy who smelled so badly when he arrived that we put him in a (much enjoyed!) bubble bath the very first night he was here….a little boy who has been ridiculed and excluded, teased and isolated….a little boy who has never known the loving arms of a mother or the mentorship of a father….a little boy who sobbed in my lap, big heaving sobs when he knew it was time to go back to the orphanage….a little boy who is just starting to believe that he is smart and strong and brave…..a little boy who learned about God’s love for him quite possibly for the first time ever.

David summed it up so succinctly today when he said, “Ruslan is a helpless boy in a hopeless situation.” That child did not ask for the life he is living, and he deserves far better.

I look at the numbers on paper…..each incremental payment due one after the other….and I don’t know how we’ll make them. Truthfully…I honestly don’t have any idea where that money will come from. But, I know that the Lord has placed a stirring in our hearts for this little boy, and I know that no one will adopt Ruslan based on a profile in a book or a brief encounter with him. His layers are too deep, his façade is too strong, he’s been hurt too much, and he is slow to let his guard down. He is embarrassed of his appearance, and has an exterior shell hardened by ridicule. But beneath all of that, is the gentle boy who shared lovingly with Mason, traced a heart over his chest when I told him no one could ever take away the memories we made, and reached up with vulnerability each night for a goodnight hug.

I know that God’s provision is greater than I can ever imagine, and that if this little boy is meant to come home to us then he will. David explained that the best thing we can do is tell anyone and everyone we know our story….not a story about our family, but a story of how we are fighting for this little boy. How we want to change the course of his life eternally. So I share that story with you tonight. And if you feel led, feel free to share our blog, strike up a conversation, whatever it takes to spread the word. We can take care of Ruslan once he arrives, but we need a village to help us get him here.

We told Ruslan if he missed us at the orphanage, he could hug his pillow and we’d be hugging ours too. Tonight, I surely will be, and I hope he can feel that love a world away!